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Surviving Loss on Valentine’s Day

February 2021

Valentine’s Day is almost here. Everywhere you go you see colorful, enticing ads for flowers, jewelry, and photos of blissfully happy couples. Does it make you smile or make you want to curl into a ball and hide? Millions of people are without that special love, through death, divorce, separation, or personal situations. Are you one of them?

If that iconic Valentine’s red heart is broken in your eyes, there are steps you can take to patch it up, even for just this one dreaded day. You’ll find there can be pleasure, joy and smiles; even if it’s not in the form you envisioned. Happiness can come in many surprising ways:

  • First acknowledge that you’re feeling alone and in pain – it’s normal.
  • Give yourself permission to feel down and even depressed – it’s your right. 
  • Make certain to get dressed, get out of your house, and socialize. It’s a temporary fix, but it helps.
  • Reach out to someone else who needs love.
  • Give a valentine card to a young child. Sometimes they get left out in school. Watch the smile on their face.
  • Buy yourself a present. Repeat to yourself that you are loved by others.
  • Help a stranger or volunteer at a charity or homeless shelter. It will automatically make you feel better.
  • Take yourself to a movie (not a romantic, mushy one), or better yet, go with a friend.
  • Exercise or find another positive diversion.
  • Thank someone who has loved you; a parent, relative, friend, children, grandchildren. Wish them a Happy Valentine’s Day.
  • Remember the good times and remind yourself that there will be more to come. Then believe it will happen.
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