from Solutions Counseling & EAP

by Keri Forbess-McCorquodale, MS, LPC, LMFT, CEAP

New Year’s Resolution: A New Street

Aah, January . . . land of the New Year’s Resolutions. Over the years, I have written many times about resolutions for the January issue of Thrive. I’ve given you my general thoughts on resolutions, made suggestions about how to formulate good resolutions, and given you my argument for not having any resolutions at all.

This year feels different. I very much feel like we need a fresh start for 2022. And resolutions are a good way to evaluate our current situations and decide what we want different for ourselves. 

Recently I had a client ask me if something is wrong with them. “Why can’t I stop doing the things I know I shouldn’t do?” “Why can’t I be stronger and stick to my decisions?” Our discussion made me immediately think of one of my favorite poems to address why it is so difficult for us to make and stick with positive change. 

There’s a Hole in My Sidewalk

by: Portia Nelson

Chapter I

I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost . . . I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter II

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

Chapter III

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in… it’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault . . . I get out immediately.

Chapter IV

I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

Chapter V

I walk down another street.

As we make our way into 2022, which street – or streets – is it time for you to stop going down? Which streets would be healthier for you to start taking instead? As you can see by the poem, it is normal for us to have to fall into that darn hole several times before we decide to love ourselves enough to choose a different street. You deserve this, and you can do it!